Sunday, 13 March 2016

Too Many Eyes

Have you ever come across the phrase "too many eyes" on it or something?

Years back, when someone mentioned it to me, I understood it right away due to the current situation occurring back then. Basically it's one of the most common form of justification for an unwanted occurrence which has happened to you due to strong negative feelings, most likely from jealousy or envy, from another party.

Looking back, one can never be too careful and of course, it is definitely something you can always take in with a pinch of salt.

An image found online. Beware the influence of the green-eyed monster.

Whilst lounging on the settee this afternoon, the celebrity being interviewed on TV was explaining to the media on how a recent gossip was all about another party's agenda to ruin his reputation and how such acts were overboard in their efforts to bring him down.

Somehow it triggered my mind to this phrase "too many eyes" on it/object/subject/him or her success.

Jealousy or envy, is definitely a strong feeling that often than not, channelled wrongly, can drive a person to extremes just to topple the other person's success or good thing. Even the simplest and most basic thing can be an object of jealousy, be it for men or women. The object of such feelings cuts across the board from family life, workplace, the political arena to just browsing FB/Insta.

No one's perfect. Even the most god-fearing people have them. However, the smart ones would rather channel those feelings to drive themselves to succeed, do better and engage in healthy competition rather than by way of dirty means.

Those who claim they've never felt envious or jealous about something, don't fool yourself. At one point in your life, you have. It's one of the basic fundamental form of feelings and behaviour you develop growing up. It's how you manage it which defines you.

I recall years back, I was carrying my Salvatore Ferragamo handbag, a gift from my Boyfie then now husband, to one of my international meetings. Bear in mind, branded handbags and gadgets are common among delegates. All of us work hard and saved up to meet our wants. Nothing to brag about. Back then the bag was one of the most recent collections of course. Seniors and friends from other ministries commented on it. Of course I was pleased as it further affirmed Boyfie's good fashion sense and it was a gift to boot. Comes then this one lady. I can't recall her name. She was one of the young ones from another Ministry. She was particularly interested in the bag asking many questions. Being friendly and all, of course I indulged the ones that I considered not personal. She was very friendly as well. What sets her apart though was how she went on and on about it for quite awhile. While compliments from others were quick, simple and common, hers were, perhaps bordering "fake". Being positive about people I didn't give it much thought. I was there for a different purpose i.e. to focus on my negotiations with the other party for an international agreement.

Then, I noticed, though there were ample space beside her, she seemed to be inching closer to me. In my mind, I was already afraid her pen would leave a mark on my handbag. Lo and behold, she did. There, a spot on my purple bag, a line of blue ink in swiping motion. She apologised of course and I accepted without giving much thought. Once I was home I tried to clean it. It took several wipes and a few trips to the cleaners before it was totally gone.

Again, being nice and believing in all things good, I dismissed it as just one of those "ter" moments.

Only one or two years later, when another incident almost similar occurred to me, and a colleague mentioning how her culture and religion believes that "someone has eyes on it or too many eyes on it", I begun to take such things seriously. I think we Malays have a similar belief but I'm not sure how we phrase it.

This "too many eyes" phrase popped up recently again relating to how one of my belongings was damaged when I've never suffered any to my previous belongings in such a way.

The point is, when sharing news of success or a good thing, be careful. Though  you may have no intention to brag or maybe you do, one can never be too careful. Even among friends. That negative energy may not come from your friends directly but maybe friends of your friends? You never know. Even strangers and keyboard warriors have no qualms typing all those negative stuff online to hurt you. Cyber bullying is definitely rampant nowadays.

Have an awesome Sunday peeps...